International Section of EQI.org
under construction

EQI.org was created in North America by Steve P. Hein, who was born in the USA and lived there till about age 40. He then lived in Canada and Australia before beginning an odessy around the world which took him to approximately 60 countries as a traveler, not a tourist. As ot 2014 he lives in Uruguay, South America.

The content of EQI.org has changed as Steve has changed. At the start, the site was based almost exclusively on the American culture, beliefs, values, topics, information, sources perspectives, current issues, etc. The site visitors came mostly from America, England and other English speaking countries.

For approximately 15 years Steve worked mostly alone on the site. In 2009 he was joined by his partner, Priscilla, who was raised in Mexico and England. They trravelled to over 30 countries together, always learning something new from each one.

Now they are expanding the scope of the site to a wider audience around the world They believe the American and British views about emotions and emotional intelligence are largely unhealthy for the world so they want to offer their perspective as citizens of the world, not of any particular country or culture. To this end we are introducing this internatioal section of EQI.org.

Below are some things we found from sites around the world who have

We encourage people around the world to translate EQI.org. We appreciate it when you let us know that you are translating something and we will be happy to put a link to it.

Steve, Priscilla and the volunteers

Czech Republic

Denmark

Germany

Indonesia

Slovakia

Russian

Spanish

Core Components of EQI.org

Respect | Empathy
Caring | Listening
Understanding

Other EQI.org Topics:

Emotional Literacy
Invalidation | Hugs
Emotional Abuse |
Feeling Words
Depression | Education
Emotional Intelligence
Parenting | Personal Growth

Search EQI.org | Support EQI.org

EQI.org Library and Bookstore

A list of all files on EQI.org

From http://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei/tkritika.php

Emocn� inteligence

Heinova kritika testu emocn� inteligence

Podle Heina lze za testy emocn� inteligence vyd�vat pouze testy MEIS a MSCEIT, nebot reprezentuj� spr�vnou definici. Hein tak� ver�, že již brzy prijde konec meren� osobnostn�ch dovednost� a schopnost�, kter� tvrd�, že mer� emocn� inteligenci.

Od t� doby, co se rozš�rili jin� testy (krome MEIS, MSCEIT) jako testy EI, shodla se akademick� rada, že všechny tyto ostatn� testy jsou pouze novou formou osobnostn� testu, a proto nemer� vskutku nic nov�ho pod sluncem. Cl�nek Roberta McCrae v knize Reuvon Bar-Ona The Handbook of Emotional Intelligence nab�z� jedno z nejlepš�ch vysvetlen�, proc je tak zav�dej�c� naz�vat test Goleman/Hay McBer ECI 360 testem emocn� inteligence. McCrae napr�klad poukazuje na skutecnost, že veci jako optimismus, bychom meli sp�še naz�vat osobn�m rysem než formou inteligence.

Jak pochop�me, probl�m osobnostn�ch rysu tkv� v:

• pozornosti, kter� se nevenuje detem (u det� lze sn�ze odlišit potenci�ln� a naucen� schopnosti)
• ignoruj� emocn� genialitu
• jsou velmi subjektivn�
• neberou v �vahu odlišnost testovan�ch osobnost� (Co je nejlepš� pro mne nen� nejlepš� pro tebe.)
• nemer� potenci�l

Hein ve sv�m pr�spevku vyj�dril upr�mn� znepokojen� nad situac�, kdy tyto ostatn� testy zaplavily trh a jsou nad�le podporov�ny. Starost m� hlavne z duvodu jejich schv�len� jako testu emocn� inteligence, prestože zkušenosti akademick�ch pracovn�ku s temito testy tvrd� prav� opak. Ob�v� se tak�, že je jedin�m clovekem, kter� usiluje o jejich z�nik.

Nejpozoruhodnejš�mi testy t�to kategorie jsou Emotional Competence Inventory (ECI 360) Daniela Golemana a EQ Inventory (EQi) Reuvona Bar-Ona. Hein souhlas� s rozhodnut�m akademick�ch v�zkumn�ku, kter� usoudili, že ž�dn� z testu se nekvalifikuje jako test emocn� inteligence. C�t� proto politov�n� a zklam�n�, že bylo mnoho lid� oklam�no za �celem koupe techto testu jako testu EI.

Z�kladn�mi probl�my testu ECI a EQi:

• testy nemer� aktu�ln� schopnosti osoby

  Rozporupln� je napr�klad rychlost vyplnen� testu. Pruzkum v t�to oblasti zjistil, že rychlost vyplnen� testu byla vždy ruzn�. Pruzkum d�le zjistil, že v�sledkem testu schopnost� jsou vetšinou informace, kter� o sobe m� dotycn� osoba. Sebe-hodnot�c� testy však všeobecne nejsou dobr�mi indik�tory aktu�ln� schopnost�.

  Konkr�tne Bar-On EQi je typick�m pr�kladem sebe-hodnot�c�ho testu. Golemanuv ECI je sebe-hodnot�c�m testem jen do urcit� m�ry, nebot jsou vyžadov�ny n�zory druh�ch na schopnosti testovan�ho. Na druh� strane tyto n�zory nemus� b�t presn�m indik�torem aktu�ln�ch schopnost�. Jin� osoby totiž neposkytnou vždy aktu�lne presn� informace. Test MSCEIT je v t�to oblasti (do urcit� m�ry) jedin�m testem, kter� mer� schopnosti aktu�ln�, kter� jsou požadov�ny tvurci testu pri rešen� probl�mu.

• testy nemer� aspekty lidsk� osobnosti, kter� již predt�m nebyli mereny existuj�c�mi osobnostn�mi testy

  Tento probl�m byl již zm�nen v�še. Je faktem, že se akademick� obec shodla na tom, že testy ECI i EQi nemer� nic z toho, co by již v minulosti mereno nebylo.

Test MEIS a MSCEIT

Zac�tkem roku 1990 byl v publikaci Mayera a Saloveye poprv� použit� pojem „emocn� inteligence“. Mayer a jeho kolegov� se pot� pokusili vyvinout test schopnost�. Pr�klad testu schopnost� mel b�t testem k vyplnen�, kde je uveden jeden aktu�ln� vzor (sebe-hodnot�c� test k vyplnen� mel jednoduše zjistit, jak rychle test vyplnovat).

V testech použ�van�ch Mayerem a jeho skupiny jsou pokl�d�ny ot�zky na identifikaci emoc� z oblicejov�ch v�razu na fotografi�ch (napr�klad Mayer, J.D., DiPaolo, M.T., & Salovey, P. (1990). Bylo objeveno, že mnoho lid� je v t�to schopnosti �spešnejš�ch než jin�. Tento a dalš� testy vedli vedce k rozhodnut�, že existuj� z�zracn� deti s vysoce rozvinutou emocn� inteligenc�. Od roku 1990 pokracovali v�zkumn�ci v hled�n� cest ke zdokonalen� spolehlivosti a overen� platnosti testu. V posledn�ch letech srovnali v�sledky testu s meren�m osobnostn�ch rysu a meren� tradicn� inteligence. V�sledky spolehlive potvrdili, že vskutku tyto testy mer� nove identifikovanou formu inteligence.

Hein upozornuje, že skupina MSC byla v posledn�ch 10 letech velice obezretn� v z�verech sv�ch v�zkumu a nepreh�nela ž�dn� tvrzen�. Nav�c jednotliv� clenov� nejsou motivov�ni v�delkem z prodeje testu. Zkr�tka skupina MSC rad� na prvn� m�sto v�zkum a rozš�ren� poznatku o lidsk� podstate.

Když se objevila Golemanova kniha, rozhodla se skupina MSC zab�vat zneužit�m pojmu pojmu emocn� inteligence. V roce 1995 dukladne shrnuli krit�ria užit� pojmu emocn� inteligence jako mnohostrann�ho testu v cl�nku Emotional Intelligence as Zeitgeist, Personality and Intelligence (n�sleduj� jeho shrnut�).

Jak vypl�v� z tohoto cl�nku, tak EQi test Reuvona Bar-Ona m� velice zaj�mavou minulost. Ran� verze tohoto testu byla totiž vyvinuta Reuvenem predt�m než slyšel o pojmu emocn� inteligence. Bylo to v dobe, kdy pracoval jako student na sv� disertacn� pr�ci. V t� dobe vytvoril psychologick� test well-being, kter� nikdy neoznacil jako test EI. Zd� se tedy, že byl Bar-On motivov�n Golemanovou knihou a využil marketingu, aby test propagoval za test emocn� inteligence. Mayer vyslovil z�roven n�mitku vuci jeho definici EI a tvrzen�, že jeho test ji mer�.

Ned�vn� v�voj však ukazuje, že Bar-On a t�m MSC evidentne spolupracuj� na dohode o verejn� definici emocn� inteligence a porozumen� tomu, co každ� z testu mer�. Fakt, že Mayer napsal dve kapitoly v Bar-Onove knize je dostatecn�m znamen�m t�to spolupr�ce.

Jin�m znamen�m je to co si mužeme prec�st na EMONETu a co Bar-On prohl�sil:

Ackoliv je EQ-i prvn�m testem emocn� inteligence, kter� byl puvodne publikov�n jako psychologick� test, muže presneji popisovat sebe-hodnot�c� meren� emocn�ch a soci�ln�ch kompetenc� v chov�n�, kter� poskytuje odhad jedn� emocn� a soci�ln� inteligence. (EMONET digest 403, May 2000)

Toto prohl�šen� je shodn� s myšlenkou, kterou Reuven uvedl v knize The Handbook of Emotional Intelligence. Koneckoncu v manu�lu, kter� se objevil s testem EQi, se vysvetluje meren� EQi takto: „Emocn� inteligence je tedy souhrnem schopnost�, kompetenc� a dovednost�, kter� neslouž� k pozn�n�, ale ovlivnuj� zpusobilost b�t �spešn� tv�r� v tv�r �trap�m a n�tlaku.“ (Bar-On, R. (1997). The Emotional Quotient Inventory (EQ-i): Technical Manual. Toronto, Canada: Multi-Health Systems.)

Bar-On tedy bere na vedom�, že EQi je sebe-hodnot�c� test. Jako všechny sebe-hodnot�c� testy usnadnuje testovan�m hodnocen� a spr�vn� sebepozn�n�. (Zejm�na když do testu vch�zej� prohl�šen� typu: „Jsem schopn� identifikovat moje pocity.“)

Bar-Onuv test je k dispozici u firmy Multi-Health Systems, kter� jej doposud podporuj� jako test emocn� inteligence. Již zhruba dva roky MHS mluv� o tom, že bude na prodej test MSCEIT, ale zat�m nemaj� povolen� k prodeji verejnosti. Maj� exklusivn� kontrakt s MSC, kter� naneštest� zamezili nekomu jin�mu prodej testu. V t�to dobe zat�m MHS vydel�v� hodne penez prodejem Bar-On EQi. Zrejme tedy nem� duvod b�t motivov�ni nal�hat na povolen� MSCEIT. Povzbuzuji v�s tedy ke kontaktu s nimi a ž�d�m, aby byli rychlejš�.

Hein m� z�jem na takov�m testu, kter� m� jasnou filozofii jako: „At je clovek chytr�, nepoctiv� nebo m� malou znalost literatury emocn� inteligence, muže b�t schopen relativne snadno vyc�slit spr�vnou odpoved.“ V�zkumn�ci oznacuj� cinnost tech, kter� z�merne lžou v sebe-hodnot�c�ch testech jako impression management.

Kuriozita

Zkušenostn� data ukazuj� na podstatn� vztah mezi EI a existuj�c�mi osobnostn�mi m�rami. Kuri�zne jsou nyn� použ�v�ny tyto z�vislosti jako nosn� diskriminant platnosti (validity) a r�dn� spolehlivosti (reliability) EI (v�ce Bar-On, 2000). Napr�klad ned�vn� studie Dawda and Hart (2000) odhalila prumernou korelaci približne 0.50 mezi m�rou Big Five Personality Factors (neurotismus, extroverze, otevrenost, ochota, z�sadovost) a celkov� EI odvozen� z Bar-On Emotional Quotient Inventory (v Table 7, p. 807).

Zpr�va relativn� nez�vislosti každ� z Big-Five Factors (v Costa & McCrae, 1992), tak naznacuje, že data z Bar-On Emotional Quotient Inventory nejsou nic�m, nebot prumer složen�ch Big-Five Personality constructs ukazuje na presvedcuj�c� a z�roven velice slibn� n�zk� neurotismus.

Steve Hein's Emotional Intelligence Site - EQ Institute Home Page , Academic/Serious - June 2002: „Emotional Intelligence Tests“;

Model emocn� inteligence S. Heina

EI vs. EQ (S. Hein)

Heinova kritika skupiny MSC

More pages from ei.czechian.net

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei/tkritika.php

http://ei.czechian.net/index.php

http://ei.czechian.net/obsah.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/autori.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei/

ttp://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei/aplikace.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei/smisene.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei/srovnani.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei/testukazka.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/ei/tkritika.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/emoce.php

http://ei.czechian.net/webs/intel.php

http://www.psykoweb.dk/Vrede_Raseri/Vrede8-link.htm

http://www.psykoweb.dk/psykoterapi/emotional3.htm

http://www.psykoweb.dk/psykotest/test.htm

http://www.psykoweb.dk/psykoterapi/emotional2a.htm

http://www.psykoweb.dk

selvtillid/8f-Selvrespekt.htm

http://www.psykoweb.dk/Vrede_Raseri/Vrede1.htm

Germany

by Rob Tr�ger on March 31, 2011

http://www.dieontogenetischeseite.de/kritikanJanovundPT.htm

Today I stumbled upon a list of forty ‘emotional needs’ on a fascinating site, EQI.org, by Steve Hein. He constructed the list from the sites of several students of emotional intelligence and of Maslow’s hierarchy (which has five levels of needs — physical, security, belonging, self-esteem and self-actualization). The forty emotional needs cut across the four highest Maslow levels, and I’ve sorted them roughly according to this hierarchy:

Security Needs(needs from others): the need to be:

free
helped
private
reassured
safe/secure
supported
treated fairly
understood

Belonging Needs (needs from others): the need to be:

accepted
acknowledged
forgiven
included
trusted
worthy

Self-Esteem Needs (needs from others): the need to be:

admired
appreciated
approved of
believed in
heard
listened to
loved
needed
noticed
recognized
respected
valued

Self-Actualization Needs (needs of self): the need to be:

capable
challenged
clear (not confused)
competent
confident
forgiving
fulfilled
helpful
important
in (self-)control
learning
powerful
productive/useful
understanding

I’ve added "learning" to the final list, because I believe that we have a need to be constantly learning, improving ourselves (just check out the most popular section of the bookstore if you doubt me). Otherwise I think Steve’s list is pretty complete. I agree with his omission of "happy" from the list, because I think happiness is the "result" of us fulfilling most of our physical and intellectual/emotional needs, not a need in itself.

The list interests me from two perspectives:

• In reading Richard Moss’ The Mandala of Being, and in my study of Jung’s quaternity (our minds, emotions, body/senses and instincts), I’ve been looking at the place of our emotional selves in who we are and what we do. I agree with Moss’ view that we have become somewhat unbalanced towards the intellectual and emotional aspects of ourselves, to the detriment of our sensory and intuitive selves, and that, as a result, we live too much in our heads, at the mercy of our abstract ideas and fictional stories about the world and ourselves, and at the mercy of the stressful emotions that these ideas and stories trigger, so that, instead of living in Now Time like most of Earth’s creatures (and perhaps pre-civilization humans), we live in what I’ve dubbed Anxious Time. The above list suggests to me that there may be another, ‘through’ approach in addition to the ‘around’ approach that Moss advocates. That ‘through’ approach entails healing ourselves and others through "empathy", helping them and ourselves to satisfy and fill these forty intellectual/emotional needs, by caring and attention and appreciation. It’s almost the antithesis of Moss’ approach, and I see the merits of both approaches.
• As illustrated in the graphic above, my experience has been that most people seem, during their lives, to travel the path depicted by the red arrow — starting as babies with needs, erratically ‘maturing’ those needs into wants and loves, but then too often retreating back to neediness. A more mature approach, that some people I know seem to have found, is depicted by the green arrow — nurturing ourselves and others so that we ‘outgrow’ our needs, so that what we strive for is what we want and love but do not need, to the point we achieve an emotional maturity that is not needy.

I accept that this is all rather abstract — talking about our emotions in such analytical terms is a bit bizarre. But then that’s what psychologists do, and I have to believe we can find a better way of coping with our emotional needs than their dubious and expensive approaches.

So in short I’m thinking about three different alternatives to psychotherapy and medication to deal with modern emotional stresses:

1. Learning to live in "Now Time" (freeing ourselves from emotional stress and illness by bringing ourselves back to a natural and prehistoric balance of the four elements of the quaternity).
2. Learning "empathy" (resolving emotional stress and illness by love and appreciation and attention for each other).
3. Learning to "outgrow our needs" (resolving emotional stress and illness by developing the maturity and self-sufficiency to love more, and — emotionally at least — to need less).

I’ve done enough self-analysis to know myself reasonably well, and I am convinced that the only emotional needs I now have are the need to be free (the first one in the list above) and the needs to self-actualize (the last 14 in the list). Of these needs, all but the first are needs that I can fulfill (and have fulfilled) within myself. All I ‘need’ of others and our society is to be free. Perhaps this is a rationalization, but it explains why, when I am in the forest alone, or playing with cats and dogs, I am completely happy, fulfilled. I neversuffer from emotional insecurity, loneliness, or lack of self-esteem. I love to love and be in love, but I feel no need to be loved.

So this third, ‘outgrowing needs’ approach seems to work for me. Still, I like the first, ‘Now Time’ approach, because while I don’t need it, it does help me cope with the four stresses that continue to dog me (grief for Gaia, anxiety about coming civilizational collapse and what it will mean for my granddaughters’ generation, trying to live up to others’ unreasonable expectations of me, and impatience with my tendency to procrastinate on things that are important). And, as I reported in my review of Karla McLaren’s Emotional Genius, I also like the second, ‘empathy’ approach, because it would seem to be the most useful to help the people who I love, to become happier.

Readers of this blog are aware that I have suffered from two serious ailments in my life: chronic depression, from adolescence until quite recently, and a chronic auto-immune disease called ulcerative colitis since 2006. I have speculated on the causes of these maladies (I blame the social consequences of overpopulation and overcrowding for our depression epidemic, and environmental pollutants for our auto-immune disease epidemic). But whatever the cause, the trigger or catalyst for both diseases is undoubtedly emotional stress. There is a growing consensus (both Steve Hein and Karla McLaren write about this) that depression is not an emotion, but a ‘shutting-down’, a putting on the brakes, that occurs in us when we get overwhelmed by a sustained trauma. It is the longer-term emotional equivalent of the physical shock that wracks our bodies in the case of a sudden severe injury. Severe depression is painful, ghastly beyond description, like an endless feeling of drowning.

I am not a believer in ‘curing’ such maladies, because even if we could confirm the causes, we could probably not ‘cure’ them — they are a fact of modern life. All we can hope to do is prevent the stresses that trigger them. I made huge changes in my life to reduce the likelihood of such stresses recurring, and they are helping. But there’s a paradox: To some extent we learn to cope with stress through practice, and now that I have less stressors in my life, I sense that I am becoming more vulnerable to the smaller stresses that still occur, and to any future, unpredictable major stresses that may occur. I am getting out of practice.

I am hopeful that by learning to live more in Now Time (the first approach), I will not become traumatized and needy when such overwhelming stresses inevitably occur. I have used the third approach (outgrowing my emotional needs) as my principal ‘preventative medicine’ for future emotional illness, and plan to use the first approach as a back-up.

But I do recognize that our world is a prison, an asylum, and that most people live lives full of anxiety and steeped in emotional trauma. Their unmet needs span all five levels of Maslow’s hierarchy, and (since I’m not really a believer in psychotherapy or psychopharmacy) I suspect the best approach for helping them is probably the second one — empathy.

Being something of a misanthrope, empathy is not my strong suit, and it is something I am not practiced in. But it’s important to me to learn, and the listening and attention skills it requires will benefit me in other ways, so I am going to dedicate myself to getting better at it. Here are some of the things I’ll be practicing:

Dave’s Empathy Skills Learning List

• Personal emotional awareness: Before we can help others cope with their emotions, we need to be aware of our own. Many of us our blind to our judgements (like my negative judgement of psychology, for example), and to our own emotional weaknesses.
• Emotional self-management: Learning to control my own emotional responses and reactions, emotional flexibility and resilience (especially in the face of ‘bad news’), and improving my emotional attitude (positive energy, enthusiastic).
• Emotional communication: Learning to articulate my own emotions and my understanding of others’ emotions well. This is difficult!
• Emotional attentiveness: Patience, presence, awareness of others’ emotional state, good listening skills, genuine appreciation, body language awareness, sensitivity, being supportive. Probably the most important learning I have to do.
• Situational acuity: Understanding the context, back-story and power dynamics underlyingthe emotions at work. Becoming sensitive to why people probably feel the way they do, not as a means to prescribe solutions (that is not what empathy is about), but to better understand and appreciate how people feel.

There are a lot of other emotional competencies (like conflict resolution and consensus-building) but my sense is that I should focus my initial attention on the five areas above. I’ll be looking for courses, and opportunities to practice these skills as I develop them. If anyone knows of really good programs in the Toronto area, please let me know.

The Effects of Hugs——final draft --- http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_4a39005501000955.html

Abstract:

Hugs are one of the most natural actions to show our care. While we feel great in others’ hugs, the effects of hugs are tremendous. Hugs benefit our physical health firstly. We will concentrate on how hugs help to protect our hearts and offer a touching example of the twins. Then we shift to mental health. We will find out how hugs improve our mental health and therefore save human’s lives, especially how hugs can assure child’s growth. Besides, hugs and suicide will be talk about. Moreover, let us have a look at what are people’s opinions on hugs.

1. Introduction:

“It's wondrous what a hug can do.

A hug can cheer you when you’re blue.

A hug can soothe a small child’s pain.

And bring a rainbow after rain.

We scarcely could survive without it!

A hug delights and warms and charms;

It must be why we evolved with arms.”

(http://www.gagirl.com/hugs/hug.html)

We can still remember as infants how mother hugged us. Mother’s hug is our favorite place. Hug, which is a basic need of human being, is an action of putting your arms around somebody and holding them tightly, especially to show that you like or love them. This well known international “language” takes little but has long lasting tremendous effects. Hugs benefit both our body and soul.

2.1 Hug for physical health:

Hugs are more than just skin deep and can protect our hearts. A study by University of North Carolina(UNC) researchers found that hugs increase the “love hormone” oxytocin that is related to childbirth and breastfeeding and decrease the risk of heart disease, especially for women for whom the importance of oxytocin and its potentially cardio protective effects may be greater. (Marilyn,2003) Experiment on stress and hugs, which was conducted by Assistant Research Professor of UNC Karen M. Grewen, showed when couples hugged for 20 seconds, their levels of oxytocin increased. Those in loving relationships had the highest increases. Meanwhile, women’s levels of the stress hormone cortisol and blood pressure decreased. (Karen,2003)

The baby twins’ rescuing hug demonstrated well to us what hugs can achieve. In the first week of their lives, each baby was in their respective incubator and one was not expected to live. A hospital nurse put the two babies in one incubator. The healthier one threw an arm over her sister in an endearing embrace. Then the smaller baby’s heart rate stabilized and her temperature rose to normal. Up till now, they both survived and are thriving.

2.2 Hug for mental health:

“In my work, I have found that people who receive nurturing maintain a better outlook on their situation. And historically, positive attitude is an important factor in long-term survival. Hugging is capable of making a difference in a person’s frame of mind and may help their medical condition.”(http://www.gagirl.com/hugs/hug.html) This is a prescription from Dr. Mark Katz who is a member of Los Angeles Shanti’s Advisory Board. We can tell from this prescription that hugs also do good to our mental health and in return improves physical health. In this way, hugs contribute a lot in healing disease, or even saving one’s life.

Hugs are undoubtedly important for children. Children need to be touched and hugged more regularly. They need at least five or six hugs a day compared to three of adults. Unlike food, toys and other entertainment which fulfill only the children’s basic need, hugs cultivate a sense of emotional security, telling them that we are glad they are here. By hugging, we send our children into the world with renewed inner strength to cope with the multitude of challenges they will daily face. If we want our kids to thrive, affectionate hugs are the greatest reassurance of their lovability and worth.

Besides, girl infants less than a year old receive physical affection five times as much as do boy babies. Actually, boys need to be hugged as much as girls do, especially as young children. What’s more, both boys and girls never outgrow the need for hugs.

Considering hugs’ dramatic effects, can hugs prevent suicide? So far there is no such kind of research about hug and suicide, but I strongly believe hugs are able to prevent suicide. Take Steve Hein, the author of EQ for Everybody, and his partner Laura as an example. Before they were together, both of them were feeling suicidal. They gave each other hundreds of hugs in the first days when they lived together. Afterwards, none of them felt in that way anymore. It is the intenseness of feeling alone which is one of the biggest contributors to feeling suicidal. Hugging is the natural way to make us feel that somebody still cares about us.

3. Opinions on hugs:

But in modern society, people hug less and less. How do they think about hugs? I conducted a survey among my friends and also put up the question on my blog to collect the information. My question is “what is your opinion on hug, for example to hug with your friends, parents, relatives and partners”. All together I gathered 22 answers.¹ It was quite a pity that 3 of them said that they have not hugged or been hugged for a long time that they nearly forget how it feels. They think a friend’s hug is a way to encourage and support, showing our trust, while to hug with partners can increase intimacy and affection. Owing to the Chinese culture, 5 of them remarked that they seldom hug with parents and relatives, not to mention with strangers. My friend S. L. said it is a little strange. But, nearly all of them agreed that hug is an expression of love. Hugs make you feel warm and secure, and most importantly, tell you that you are not alone. My senior high school classmate E. H. answered that if someone gives you a hug when you feel alone, the loneness will be released. You have the sense of belonging, realizing both physically and psychologically that someone there cares you. I am glad that my friend M. L. and H.Z. even called for more hugs in daily life.

4. Conclusion:

Have you not hugged or been hugged for a long time? Have you ever longed for just one hug? Do you feel like being hugged when you are sad? Are you willing to give one hug if your hug can give the person a sunny day? What are you waiting for then? Grab your partners, family members or friends and hug!

Bibliography:

More than 50 people have clicked in this page, only 22 of them responded, of which 12 are my friends.

Chrissie You.(June,2007). Survey. Retrieved June 14.2007.

from http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/4a390055010008up

Dean Walley.(n.d.).Hugs. Retrieved May 12,2007.

from http://www.gagirl.com/hugs/hug.html

Mark Katz.(n.d.).A Doctor’s Prescription for Hugging. Retrieved May 28,2007.

from http://www.gagirl.com/hugs/hug.html

Marilyn Elias.(Oct. 3, 2003).Study: Hugs warm the heart, and protect it. Retrieved June

26,2007.from http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2003-03-09-hug-usat_x.htm

Nancy Sheehan.(May,1996).Rescuing Hug. Retrieved May 28,2007.

from http://www.planetdeb.net/spirit/rescue.htm

Steve Hein.(n.d.).Hugs. Retrieved May 28,2007.

from http://eqi.org/hugs.htm

SixWise.com.(n.d.). How Hugs Are Proven to Help Your Health: Have You Been Hugged

Today?. Retrieved May 28, 2007.from

http://www.sixwise.com/newsletters/06/07/26/how_hugs_are_proven_to_help_your_health_have_you_been_hugged_today.htm

This student also had some interesting personal blog entries which I copied here

    Suddenly, I realized that sometimes we have to handle things alone. So, just be strong!
    These days, I have been doubting myself again. Whenever talking about internship, I felt frustrated. I will never fell that I am qualify to do that and that I can do it alone for I always want a companion. But when come to the reality, you find out that's impossible not to be alone at all times. And my cousin told me that I will never fell ready for the internship because I am totally green. So far I have not had any work experience. I can help questionaling myself on whether I can do that. Can I be excellent when I pursuit my job? And no answer yet.     The reason why I wrote down this is all due to the programme 'American's next top model'. After the exam of Accounting Principle, I indulged myself of doing nothing but watching the American TV series. And then there it is. Chances are always for those who are prepared and rea

  All of a sudden, I think of my faith again.
    When I was still a sophomore, Ann has talked about faith in one of our integrated reading classes.  Maybe there were some sparkles, but I simply chose to ignore them because I am too tired to spare any efforts to think about them. I can still remember my question: do I have any faith? 
    Even though I was in the rainy days and my friends kept telling me that I just need to have a little faith. All I have during that difficult time is one sentence: time will assure you. Somehow, I believe that time is all I need. It is such a great healer that no matter how painful you are, if you allow yourself some times. You will be OK.
    Now, it suddenly dawn on me that I myself do have some faiths. And that is all because of our professor of Invest

Analysis of Recent trend or Special Topic in Curriculum Planning, Design Or Curricular Assessment

--- the Recognition of Emotional Intelligence in School

Key words:Emotional Intelligence; Curricular Assessment; Intelligence Quotient

At the beginning of the semester, I organized the Lego Tower Buildinggame in my class. Forty students were divided into eight groups, with three of them as team members and two as leaders in each group. Each student was given a slip of paper on which different requirement was written. They were asked to cooperate with each other not verbally but only by gestures and at last build a tower by Lego within limited time. The purpose of the game is to cultivate students’ spirit of team work. In the process, teachers as judges really observed different characteristics of individuals. Their confidence, self-awareness, leadership, cooperative ability were partly laid out. The result showed that those who were good at study were not necessarily good at performing the task. One of the top students was even unaware of the importance of cooperation, because she built the tower on her own while neglecting others’ gestures. In one group, the members even started to blame each other by gestures which of course led to their failure. While in the winner groups, most of the members were not the so-called top students but good at intrapersonal and interpersonal skills. The game brought out such questions: The characteristics shown in the game were just the components of EI; IQ is definitely not complete in judging a person; Are there any ways or some curriculum for teachers to improve students’ EI? I thought of one of the articles concerning EI and MI , and started to have a study on that when back at home.

The term“ emotional intelligence” was first coined by Salovey and Mayer in 1990. They described emotional intelligence as "a form of social intelligence that involves the ability to monitor one’s own and others’ feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them, and to use this information to guide one’s thinking and action". Salovey and Mayer also initiated a research program intended to develop valid measures of emotional intelligence and to explore its significance. For instance, they found in one study that when a group of people saw an upsetting film, those who scored high on emotional clarity (which is the ability to identify and give a name to a mood that is being experienced) recovered more quickly. In another study, individuals who scored higher in the ability to perceive accurately, understand, and appraise others’ emotions were better able to respond flexibly to changes in their social environments and build supportive social networks. In the early 1990’s Daniel Goleman became aware of Salovey and Mayer’s work, and this eventually led to his book, Emotional Intelligence. Goleman was a science writer for the New York Times, whose beat was brain and behavior research. He believes having a high "emotional intelligence" is critical for one’s success in the world. Emotional Intelligenceappears to be an important set of psychological abilities that relate to life success. Daniel Goleman’s provocative book , Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More than IQ for Character, Health and Lifelong Achievement posed the theory that it is empathy and communication skills as well as social and leadership skills that will be central to your success in life and personal relationships. Rather than a high IQ, Goleman purports that it is far better to have a high E-IQ, emotional intelligence, if you want to be a valued and productive member of our society. Researches proved that IQ by itself is not a very good predictor of one’s performance in life. Hunter and Hunter estimated that at best IQ accounts for about 25 percent of the variance. Sternberg has pointed out that studies vary and that 10 percent may be a more realistic estimate. One example is a study of 80 Ph.D.’s in science who underwent a battery of personality tests, IQ tests, and interviews in the 1950s when they were graduate students at Berkeley. Forty years later, when they were in their early seventies, they were tracked down and estimates were made of their success based on resumes, evaluations by experts in their own fields, and sources like American Men and Women of Science. It turned out that social and emotional abilities were four times more important than IQ in determining professional success and prestige (Carry Cherniss, Ph.D. 2000).Daniel Goleman also found from his research that poor emotional competencies led to poor marriage relationships and unproductive work relationships. As Goleman writes: in his book on Emotional Intelligence, "An analysis of the personality traits that accompany high IQ in men who lack these emotional competencies portrays, well, the stereotypical nerd: critical and condescending, inhibited and uncomfortable with sensuality, emotionally bland. By contrast, men with the traits that mark emotional intelligence are poised and outgoing, committed to people and causes, sympathetic and caring, with a rich but appropriate emotional life – they're comfortable with themselves, others, and the social universe they live in." All in all, the term EI encompasses five characteristics and abilities: Self-awareness---knowing your emotions, recognizing feelings as they occur, and discriminating between them; Mood management---handling feelings so they're relevant to the current situation and you react appropriately; Self-motivation---"gathering up" your feelings and directing yourself towards a goal, despite self-doubt, inertia, and impulsiveness; Empathy---recognizing feelings in others and tuning into their verbal and nonverbal cues; Managing relationships---handling interpersonal interaction, conflict resolution, and negotiations.

After having an understanding of what is EI and why is EI important, a doubt came up: Is EI being recognized by school and being applied in the curriculum? First, I need to trace back to human development to see if it, as one of the four bases of curriculum, is related to EI. The concept of stages of human development is a useful tool for understanding the needs of learners at various levels of education, but it cannot define the development of any one learner at a particular age. Each learner is innately unique, and this inborn individuality indicates the importance of providing many alternatives in educational program (Forrest W.Parkay & Glen Hass2000). And each learner in different period, has different EI. Knowledge of human development enables curriculum planners to design curricula that are shaped, in part, by the nature and needs of individual learner. While in order to achieve the match between the learner’s developmental stage and the curriculum, five aspects of human development to guide curriculum planning and planning for teaching should be noticed. Among which emotional growth and development is emphasized. As Alan McCluskey mentioned EI can be learned through experience. This relates quite well EI with human development. Second, let’s move on to Erik Erikson’s developmental outline for stages of “growth toward a mature personality”, whose theory in the area of human development has had a significant influence on curriculum planning. His model is based on eight stages of growth---from infancy to old age. Each stage is characterized by a psychosocial crisis for the individual’s emotional and social growth. As is illustrated in his article: Erik Erikson’s Developmental Stages: A Healthy Personality for Every Child, for adolescence, that is, the fifth stage of human development, the psychosocial crisis is identity versus role confusion. The teenager must achieve identity in occupation, gender roles, politics and religion. The central problem of the period is the establishment of a sense of identity. The identity the adolescent seeks to clarify is who he is, what his role in society is to be. Is he a child or is he an adult? Will he be a success or a failure? By reason of these questions adolescents are sometimes morbidly preoccupied with how they appear in the eyes of others as compared with their own conception of themselves. And for some students who may have been privileged in having had a childhood in which there was little inhibition of sensual pleasures, and in which development proceeded by easy, unselfconscious stages, the difficulties arise if their parents lose trust in themselves or if their teachers apply sudden correctives, or if they themselves reject their past and try to act like others(Erik Erikson & Joan Erikson 1950).

These suddenly remind me of one of my students, Tom. The class I’m teaching is a little bit special. All the students in my class were strictly observed and tested before entering high school. They are the so-called high IQ students. So everyone in the class is unconsciously proud of themselves and has high self-esteem. One day, after testing their recitation assignment, I asked those who did fairly poor to recite to me next week in class, Tom included. After class, he suddenly ran to me and waved his arm to roar that he did actually review the text, but coincidentally forgot the lines that I’ve asked him to recite. Without waiting for my response, he flew into a big temper and crazily argued that he would not come to me. And he even punched the table. I was quite angry, I have never met such a student before and sarcastically he is studying in the so-called high IQ class. I even told myself that I would not say a word to him if he did not apologize to me. During the next week, he didn’t come to me for an apology. And in class, he dared not look at me. A week passed, I asked myself, is all my behavior all right? Can I find some reasons for his behavior? Tom was not a bad student though he was not so good at English. And he was trying hard at his study at the beginning of this semester, I can tell from his hardworking. He was always trying hard to help teachers a lot in using computer because he was the computer supervisor in my class. His flying into such a bad temper was just because he felt that he was done wrong, and he felt that the teacher did have bias over him because he was not good at English. After analysis, I found that the student did not have great confidence in himself, and was not so aware of himself, he even cannot control his temper if he thought it was against his will. He, though made me feel uncomfortable at that time, yet, I still decided to talk to him. All worked well after our chat. Tom, now take charge of more class work and becomes more confident in himself. Because I gave him more work to do, and took any chance to praise him in public if he really did a good job. From this, I made a conclusion, that EI matters a lot in students’ growing period and does play a very important role in student’s future life. I can’t imagine what Tom is like when entering society without teachers and parents’ help. One thing I am sure is that if he still can’t control himself well he will meet with great trouble in his life.

EI really is very important. Though it’s not easy for teachers to deal with different individuals, special curriculum should be designed to help students improve their EI. Scientific research, in particular on how the brain works, indicates that the formation of emotional skills is much easier in the "formative" years from birth to the late teens. Looking at existing structures, school is the major activity in that age group (Alan McCluskey 1997). During the breaks for example, Daniel Goleman describes how appointed pupil mediators, once all involved know the rules of the game, resolve conflicts in the playground. Such a "school for emotions" could be a local, community-based activity in conjunction with other activities like scouts, parent-teachers associations, artistic expression groups, clubs etc.

Though EI as a new term appeared recently, yet educators have started to realize the importance and tried hard to apply that. In our school, we had a consultant room. Every day there is consultant on duty to help students with their psychological problems. Teachers are trained periodically to deal with different students in different situations. The psychological files for students are established, it will follow students for three years, until their graduation from high school. Psychology courses for each class has increased into 2 lessons a week. Different field trips are organized and the rights of deciding where to go and what researches to make are gradually under students’ will in order to cultivate their self-confidence and cooperative ability.

EI, though is still a new term for most of us, has already started to play an important role in education. As Erikson once writes : it is clear, then, that if health of personality is to be preserved much attention must be given to assuring that school makes good on its promises to youth.

Reference:

Alan McCluskey (1997). emotional intelligence in schools

Carry Cherniss, Ph.D. (2000). Emotional Intelligence: What it is and Why it Matters

Erik Erikson & Joan Erikson (1950). Growth and Crises of the ‘Healthy Personality’

Forrest W.Parkay & Glen Hass(2000).Curriculum Planning

www.eiconsortium.org

www.connected.org

www.inst.santafe.cc.fl.us

www.eqi.or

book.http://mindspan.cn/web/product/comment.jsp?id=796

????,???????????

Emotional Literacy PDF Translated by Viktor Parhomets

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) and its components - Darina Sosnovskaya