Steve Hein's notes from:

Emotional Development and Emotional Intelligence: Educational Implications, by Peter Salovey and David Sluyter. 1997.


This book has nine academic articles which are followed by one or two pages of commentary by K-12 educators. It is fairly difficult to read. The main articles are very heavily documented and supported with research citations. A nice addition to the book is the mailing address of each contributing author. Here are my notes from a few chapters. Also, I have a couple lists of references for further research.

Chapter 1 -- What is Emotional Intelligence, by John Mayer and Peter Salovey.

First few pages are an academic discussion of emotions and intelligence and how they can be measured and categorized. It is clear that there are many definitions of both terms, so it makes sense that a term which includes them both will have even more definitions.

They point out that some people have come up with as many as 120 "intelligences." p. 6

"Others have seen emotions as something irrational, something to be regulated and controlled.."- [ie suppressed] p 8

"..Emotion and intelligence have often been seen as adversaries..." p. 8

p 9 "We view emotions as contributing to thought rather than disorganizing it." (pp)

They say that Gardner's well-known concept of multiple intelligences has only "modest support" beyond its original formation.

Authors say their model of emotional intelligence shows that EI is correlated to other intelligences, so if one is intellectually smart, they are more likely to be emotionally smart. But they go on to say that the correlation is not so strong as to say the two are measures of the same thing.

[I would point out that EI, as it is defined is based more on learned habits than is traditional intelligence. Therefore, it is possible that there would be a higher correlation if all children had equal emotional models and environments. This does not mean that I believe all children start out "emotionally equal." In fact, just the opposite is true: I believe all children start out quite different emotionally, in terms of emotional sensitivity, in particular. By the way, I believe emotional sensitivity is related to chemical sensitivity. I have noticed, for example, that people who tend to be sensitive to insect bites, boats and temperature changes also tend to be emotionally sensitive.

I also believe each child has a unique ability to recall emotions and to attach them to situations. I further believe that there is high correlation between natural sensitivity and general, or traditional, intelligence. I have never seen any research on this idea, so it is just a hypothesis. It is largely based on the idea that both intelligence and sensitivity are survival tools, so those who are more intelligent and more sensitive are more likely to have survived throughout the evolution of the human species.]

The authors try, without much success, to clarify the differences between intelligences, skills, abilities, competencies, talents, traits, and character.

They talk about the futility of trying to identify what the "right" emotions are for various situations.

[But each emotion and each response does have a survival value. We simply don't have a way to measure this well. We approximate it by measuring blood pressure, pulse and other physical indicators, but what is the effect of different emotions and emotional responses on the brain itself over a lifetime? What is the effect on personal growth and self-confidence or self-esteem? We simply do not have accurate answers to these questions. Thus we can only speculate based on everything else we know. I propose that we make things far too complicated and that our bodies tell us what is healthy by what feels good. The exception to this is for children who have been abused, which nearly every child has been to some extent. In these children their natural survival, growth systems and emotional responses have been damaged and distorted. The goal, therefore, is let children grow naturally. At the same time them to listen to their bodies and feelings.]

[I think it is on page nine that they say what is emotionally smart varies from one culture to the next- this makes testing harder]

p 10 Mayer and Salovey, the first to define emotional intelligence, have given us a new definition. They explain themselves thus:

"In our earlier work, we defined emotional intelligence according to the abilities involved in it. One of our first definitions of emotional intelligence was 'the ability to monitor one's own and other's feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them, and to use this information to guide one's thinking and action.'

But this and other definitions now seem vague in places and impoverished in the sense that they talk only about perceiving and regulating emotion, and omit thinking about feelings. A revision that corrects these problems is as follows:

Emotional intelligence involves the ability to perceive accurately, appraise, and express emotion; the ability to access and/or generate feelings when they facilitate thought; the ability to understand emotion and emotional knowledge; and the ability to regulate emotions to promote emotional and intellectual growth."

In the very next sentence, they refer to the above as "skills."

Chart from page 11

The chart is arranged with the most basic forms of EI on the lowest level (ie perception, appraisal and expression). As we move from left to right within each level, there is increasing advancement.

Reflective Regulation of Emotion to Promote Emotional and Intellectual Growth

Ability to stay open to feelings, both those that are pleasant and those that are unpleasant. Ability to reflectively engage or detach from an emotion depending upon its judged informativeness or utility. Ability to reflectively monitor emotions in relation to oneself and others, such as recognizing how clear, typical, influential or reasonable they are. Ability to manage emotion in oneself and others by moderating negative emotions and enhancing pleasant ones, without repressing or exaggerating information they may convey.

Understanding and Analyzing Emotions; Employing Emotional Knowledge

Ability to label emotions and recognize relations among the words and the emotions themselves, such as the relation between liking and loving. Ability to interpret the meanings that emotions convey regarding relationships, such as that sadness often accompanies a loss. Ability to understand complex feelings: simultaneous feelings of love and hate or blends such as awe as a combination of fear and surprise. Ability to recognize likely transitions among emotions, such as the transition from anger to satisfaction or from anger to shame.

Emotional Facilitation of Thinking

Emotions prioritize thinking by directing attention to important information. Emotions are sufficiently vivid and available that they can be generated as aids to judgment and memory concerning feelings. Emotional mood swings change the individual's perspective from optimistic to pessimistic, encouraging consideration of multiple points of view. Emotional states differentially encourage specific problem-solving approaches such as when happiness facilitates inductive reasoning and creativity.

Perception, Appraisal and Expression of Emotion

Ability to identify emotion in one's physical states, feelings, and thoughts. Ability to identify emotions in other people, designs, artwork, etc. through language, sound, appearance, and behavior. Ability to express emotions accurately, and to express needs related to those feelings. Ability to discriminate between accurate and inaccurate, or honest vs. dishonest expressions of feeling.

Four branches of EI:

1. Perception Appraisal and Expression of Emotion
2. Emotional Facilitation of Thinking
3. Understanding and Analyzing Emotions; Employing Emotional Knowledge
4. Reflective Regulation of Emotions to Promote Emotional and Intellectual Growth

"Emotions prioritize thinking by directing attention to important information." p 11

They say the EI person can recognize emotional dishonesty and manipulation 12

doesn't mention ability to forecast own emotions. but talks about ability to recognize likely transitions. then on page 12 talks about ability to "anticipate" feelings & says it can help make decisions.

In this article there is less discussion of helping others manage their emotions.

p 14 Parents tell kids to smile when sad, go to room when angry. They cite Alice Miller's "The Drama of the Gifted Child." [They do not elaborate on this, however, for example by talking about damage done to children when parents invalidate their children's feelings, i.e. leads to self alienation, emotional dishonesty, and loss of self.]

They say that the "child learns to engage and disengage emotions at appropriate times." [But first, who decides what is appropriate? Second, some parents do not even approach teaching this in healthy ways, so in many cases this is an incorrect assertion.]

p 15 Speaks of the "importance of neither exaggerating or minimizing emotions."

15 before EI teaching about emotions was mainly about behaving "well" or "nicely."

EI "does not dictate the outcome of a person's emotional behavior.." 16

19 doesn't say much about parenting or how teachers can hurt kids.

20 thinks literature is good way to teach- that we "cannot evaluate a plot" without asking" how the characters feel.-- [Disagree. I never remember talking about feelings in my English lit. classes.]

Authors like the idea of incorporating EI and the discussion of emotions in the regular coursework throughout the school day. [I agree, yet I also advocate teaching EI skills as a stand alone subject worthy of as much attention as math, grammer, history. In fact, I believe in the early years of school EI skills are more important than the academic subjects.

Other comments:

A bit overly academic in places.

They like to use art, music, theater as ways of expressing emotions, but I say these are all indirect forms of expression. Feeling words are more direct, more precise and more helpful.

They don't take strong stands on their beliefs. For example, when talking about whether schools should teach EI directly they say "we think it is worth exploring this issue." (p.20) Neither do they emphasize strongly enough the damage done to children by low EQ parents, though they must surely be aware of this undeniable fact.

Still, their work is well-worth reading.


Chapter 2

Emotional competence and self-regulation in childhood. Carolyn Saarni.

Very academic. Difficult to read. Overly complicates things. Wordy.

p 42 cites study which says kids who rely too much on others' opinions have low self-esteem, and they have more frequent mood swings and negative emotions. She says their sense of self is "fragile"

p 46 cites study which says kids will repress their negative emotions when they are "insecurely attached" to their caregivers because they are afraid of abandonment. So kids learn to be hypervigilant and they will likely repress their emotions with others. [this behavior was "adaptive" for the kids, but not when they are adults]

[This makes me think of a trick question- is it emotionally intelligent to repress your negative emotions- yes if you are dependent on someone who is a threat to you; no if it is your partner.]

Her list of "Skills of Emotional Competence" (starts on page 47)

[I have paraphrased in some places. Difference between skills, competencies and innate intelligence or potential is still unclear]

1. Awareness of one's emotional state, and higher levels, awareness that one might not be aware of one's feelings.

2. Ability to identify other's emotions.

3. Ability to use the vocabulary of emotion and expression terms commonly available in one's culture or subculture.

4. Capacity for empathetic and sympathetic involvement in other's emotional experiences.

5. Ability to realize that an inner emotional state need not correspond to outer expression, and at higher levels the ability to understand that one's emotional-expressive behavior may impact on another and to take this into account in one's self-preservation strategies.

She defines emotion management as "knowing when to express one's feelings genuinely and when to modify or even suppress their expression..."

6. Capacity for adaptive coping with aversive or distressing emotions by using self-regulatory strategies that ameliorate the intensity or temporal duration of such emotional states (e.g "stress hardiness") [Actual direct quote! Way too wordy!]

Then she lists some coping strategies which children use, divided into two sets. First, when they have moderate to high control over circumstances.

These are listed in order of helpfulness:

1. Problem-solving strategies 2. Support seeking (includes both seeking help or understanding) 3. Detachment 4. Internalizing (self-blame, worry) 5. Externalizing (blame, aggression)

The second list is when there is little or no control

1. Substitution or distraction 2. Reframing 3. Cognitive "blunting" ? or information-seeking 4. Avoidance 5. Denial 6. Dissociation of self from situation

Now back to the list of skills

7. Awareness that the quality of relationships is partly a function of the quality of emotional communication.

I would say that it helps to know that different situation require different kinds of communication & the intelligent person knows when to use which type. Ie he adapts to the situation.

Also important- we are aware of the effect we have on others' feelings.

says that children who have been abused or traumatized can't talk about their feelings and can't empathize. p 59

Conclusion: importance of managing emotions in adaptive and flexible ways.

[ie responding to each situation differently, as is in your best interest. Rather than saying in "adaptive" ways, I prefer to say in your "long term best interest" (LTBI). Many authors simply use the word "appropriately"-- but they don't define what is appropriate or who is to decide what is and what isn't. In my experience, the person in the most power decides what is "appropriate." And this is often in direct opposition to what is in the LTBI of the less- powerful person.]



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Glossary From Chapter 5 Article on Emotional Responding

Coping - Regulation in stressful contexts; changing cognitive and behavioral efforts to manage specific external or internal demands that are appraised as taxing or exceeding the resources of the individual.

Empathy-An emotional response resulting from the recognition of another's emotional state or condition, which is very similar or identical to what the other individual is perceived to experience.

Personal Distress-An aversive emotional reaction such as discomfort or anxiety resulting from exposure to another's emotional state or condition.

Regulation-The process of initiating, maintaining, or modulating the occurrence, intensity, or duration of internal feeling states and emotion-related physiological processes, behavior driven by emotion, as well as attempts to change the external situation that elicits an emotional response.

Sympathy-Feelings of sorrow for another or concern for another based on the perception of another's emotional state or condition.

Chapter 6

Emotion Regulation During Childhood: Developmental, Interpersonal and Individual Considerations, by Eliot Brenner and Peter Salovey

Authors like what they call the "functionalist" perspective on emotions, ie that emotions guide our behavior and provide information to help us achieve our goals. p 170

Talks about three aspects of emotions: 1. cognitive-experiential (that which we can describe with feeling words 2. Behavior-expressive (non-verbal expressions such as facial expressions, body language, etc.) 3. Physiological-biochemical (heart rate, brain activity, body temperature, etc.)

They define emotion regulation as: the process of managing responses that originate within cognitive-experiential, behavioral- expressive, and physiological-biochemical components. (Not a very helpful definition for teachers. Plus, teachers of young children are not going to talk to the kids about "regulating" their emotions. We need to find more common terminology. Managing their emotions is the best verb I can come up with, though I am not completely happy with it.) p 170

** make in to footnoot: SPH commentary- Even coping strategies is too academic. "Emotion handling" is more likely to be used in the schools. But this implies emotions are something a bit wild or dangerous, as in how will do we handle a loaded gun. Then there is the verb "to manage," but this still implies something wild and unrestrained... Manage; harness; utilize, use??

The word regulate also implies control, containment, confinement. I am not happy with any of these words! regulate

I guess "manage" is the best I can come up with. But it is really only the negative emotions we need to manage, the positive ones signify everything is all right. (Unless we have them in exess- as in overly opimistic.)

--- end of footnote

Later they say coping is the same thing as emotion regulation, but I don't entirely agree. Coping partly means "enduring" which is not the same as regulating. Coping with frustration, for example, implies to me that you don't really relieve the frustration, you just find a way to coexist with it. In this sense you aren't dealing with the frustration. Coping with something could mean avoidance or distraction.

A person says "I just can't cope any more"- means they can't stand it anymore. So they leave or take some other assertive action

Neither word is quite right. Again, I prefer to say emotional management.

Later they talk about "managing" distress.

Motivating yourself is not coping or regulating.

So really this chapter should say dealing with or coping with or regulating or managing negative emotions.

They limit themselves when talking about stressors - what about other negative emotions, like feeling discouraged? that is not stressful.

discouragement is something we combat, not cope with, if we want to be healthy.

"The Development of Responses to Negative Feelings" might be a better title.

Anyhow, they talk about how there are two continuum

internal vs external

external- changing the environment, running, writing internal- thought substitution

solitary vs social

solitary - writing in your journal social- calling a friend

and they talk about the continuum of how much control the child has over the event. (as we saw in chapter 2)

They say that there are three tendencies in children

1. Kids use more internal cognitive strategies as they get older 2. They use more solitary strategies as they grow. 3. As they age, they become more aware of difference between what they can control and what they can't, and what to do in each case. p 171

They found that there was no difference in the use of behavioral strategies, however. (p. 172) In other words, older kids were just as likely to suggest doing something else. The authors don't comment on this as to whether it implies anything about the kids' emotional intelligence. I tend to think that it is more emotionally intelligent to use fewer behavior strategies. On the other hand, taking constructive action in response to a negative feeling may be better than taking a cognitive approach. Again, it depends on how much control you have over something.

Some researchers make a distinction between focussing on the emotions themselves versus focussing on the problem. Others speak of primary control vs. secondary control. Brenner & Salovey put emotion focussing and primary control into their category of internal solutions, and put the others in to the category of external solutions.

(Some psychologists talk about adapting (or adjusting) ourselves to the environment, vs adapting the environment to us) Studies show all of this follows the authors' conclusion that as we age we are more likely to focus on changing ourselves rather than other people or the environment. (But at some point, we may develop the confidence to try to change the environment, such as the lady who started Mothers Against Drunk Driving)

They say kids are using internal strategies relatively well by about age 10. p 173

Next section talks about the continuum of solitary/social strategies & says kids can handle things on their own as they grow up & need less help from parents, teachers and classmates. (But the authors don't comment on whether this is healthy- it could be that they are afraid to ask for help, as I think one study showed.) p 174 The authors say "as children develop, their ability to regulate emotion without the assistance of others improves." But could it be that they are just more likely to repress and not show their emotions, or to find unhealthy outlets like smoking, entertainment, distractions? Or do they become emotionally numb from all the years of emotional abuse and invalidation?

Next section says that boys are more likely to use physical exercise and girls are more likely to use social support. Girls are also more likely to focus on their emotions and try to change them with thought management. p 175

Emotional knowledge is defined as knowledge about emotion and emotional experience in the self and others that aids in understanding and interpreting everyday life. (paraphrased) p 176

Not surprisingly this knowledge increase with age during childhood.

There is a positive correlation between children's ability to label their feelings and their tendency to help, cooperate with and share with other children. p 176

Even 6 year olds have learned to disguise their emotions, but 8 and 10 year olds were better at faking it. p 176

Next section is on the affects of parents and teachers on the kids emotion management abilities. (Interpersonal influences on emotion regulation)

They consider three ways adults influence kids:

1. indirectly 2. teaching and coaching 3. changing the environment

More studies which show what makes sense: kids have more problems and are angrier when parents argue and get angry. p 177

Kids whose parents argued a lot were more stressed when they watched films of adults arguing. p 177

Depressed mothers tend to be more critical, hostile and negative and less emotionally expressive and cooperative. p 178

[Below are a few pages I scanned at the risk of being sued! Later I plan to condense them into my own words. ]

p 178

....the ways parents manage anger and conflict may influence the development of their children's strategies for regulating emotions through the process of indirect observation.

Second, research suggests that depressed parents possess a number of deficits in parenting that may indirectly influence the development of their children's regulatory abilities.(see note 55 in book) Compared with nondepressed mothers, depressed mothers tend to be more critical, hostile, and negative and less emotionally expressive and cooperative when they negotiate with their children and with adults.

Given that depressed mothers' interactions model for their children how to regulate their own emotions, it is not surprising that parents' and children's strategies for managing depression are positively associated.

(note 56 in book) For example, it is quite possible that Jennifer, who withdraws from her peers to manage distress, may have learned this strategy from her depressed mothen

The correspondence between mothers' and children's regulatory styles was borne out in a study by Garber and colleagues that found that depressed mothers and their 8-13 year-old children reported fewer strategies to regulate sad moods, and that judges rated these strategies as less effective than strategies endorsed by nondepressed mothers and their children.

To summarize, children may learn maladaptive strategies for regulating emotion by observing parents who are depressed, angry, or experience marital conflict. Although research has focused on the acquisition of maladaptive strategies, children also learn adaptive ways of regulating emotion by observing parents, teachers, and other adults interacting with one another in positive and productive ways.

Direct Influences

Children can also learn how to regulate emotion by having their parents teach or coach them. For example, Nolen-Hoeksema and colleagues found that when mothers encouraged their 5- to 7-year- old children to complete a difficult puzzle task, children were more enthusiastic and persistent and less frustrated than children whose mothers did not encourage them. In contrast, the more critical and hostile mothers were, the less enthusiastic and persistent and the more frustrated their children were while completing the task.

In a longitudinal study of children's strategies for coping with divorce, mothers' encouragement at the beginning of the study of coping strategies like distraction, avoidance, support seeking and cognitive reframing was related positively to their children's use of these strategies 5 months later (note 57 in book)

Further, mothers' reports of their own use of active, avoidance, and support-seeking strategies were related positively to their suggestions of these strategies to their children, suggesting that parents are likely to teach their children the strategies they use. Alting he same line, a number of studies have found that parents who encourage their children to express emotion in socially appropriate ways are likely to have empathic, emotionally expressive children. (note 60 in book)

My words now: For example, acknowledging kids "appropriate expressive behavior" was linked to empathy.

(note 61) Permitting emotional expression was linked to sympathy.

Environment - tv, friends ■may■ influence emotion regulation. + if parents aren■t home they can■t regulate what shows kids watch, who they hang out with, etc.

p 179

They talk about "dispositional differences" a) depression b conduct problems, c) maltreatment

Depressed kids withdraw, use avoidant strategies...

p 180:

... investigators found that dysphoric children were more likely than nondysphoric children to report withdrawal strategies and to find assertive strategies ineffective. In a similar study of S- to 17-year-olds, those who were clinically depressed were less likely to endorse active, problem-focused, or cognitive distraction strategies than children who were not depressed. (note 66)

Jennifer's difficulty in cognitively distracting herself from peers' teasing and insensitive remarks is typical of depressed children and adolescents, who are less likely than their nondepressed peers to use cognitive strategies (e.g., positive self-statements) to cope with negative moods. (note 67) For example, we found that 9- and 10-year-old dysphoric children reported less frequent use of cognitive distraction (e.g., "thinking about something else") to ameliorate sad moods in their everyday lives than nondysphoric children. In addition, after watching mood- inducing videotapes in their school classrooms, dysphoric children were not as proficient as nondysphoric children in using distraction to ameliorate sad moods or in using distraction to maintain happy moods. Similarly, a longitudinal study by Sandler and colleagues of the effects of divorce on 10-year-old children found that children who relied less upon active, cognitive coping strategies at the beginning of the study were more likely to report depressive symptoms 4 months later. (note 70) Finally, research suggests that depressed children are more likely than nondepressed children to use negative behavior (e.g., yelling at someone) to cope with sad moods. Taken togethen it appears that clinically depressed and dysphoric children do not manage distress, ameliorate negative moods, or maintain positive moods as well as nondepressed children. The direction of causality between deficits in emotion regulation and depression is not clear at this time, although the study by Sandler and colleagues suggests that regulatory deficits may predispose children to later depression.

Conduct problems

Research has found a positive relitionship between maladaptive stvles of emotion regulation and conduct problems (e.g., fighting, lying, and defiance). (72) For example when 4 to 5 year-old children described how they would cope with stressful situations, those with problems reported greater use of angry and aggressive strategies than did children without these problems; A similar study found that when preschool children were exposed to situations involving adults in distress, children with conduct problems tended to exhibit angry facial expressions toward the adults. Finally, in a study of 7- to 14-year-old children's responses to positive feedback from a peer, children with conduct problems showed more hostile facial expressions to the feedback than children without these problems (75) Following the feedback, children with conduct problems ...

p 181

...were also less accurate than other children in identifying the facial expressions they exhibited, suggesting that children with conduct problems may have less insight into their emotional experiences than children without these problems. Taken together these studies suggest that children with conduct problems tend to regulate emotion with aggressive strategies in which they vent their anger. These children may rely upon these strategies to a greater degree than other children because children with conduct problems have less insight into their own and others' emotional experiences.


Jennifer, who was physically abused as a young child, was inclined to threaten peers when they teased her. Her response is consistent with empirical research that has found that children who have been physically abused or neglected often exhibit aggressive emotion regulation strategies that are similar to those of children with conduct problems. For example, when 8-12 year-old children were observed during free play sessions at a summer day camp, those who had been physically abused were found to use more physically and verbally aggressive strategies to regulate emotion than those who had not been abused, 76 Likewise, after 5-year-old boys viewed a staged angry conflict between their mothers and an adult, children who had been physically abused showed more physical and verbal aggression than nonabused children. 77 Recent studies have also found that the severity , frequency, and chronicity of maltreatment are associated with the severity , frequency, and chronicity of conduct problems in 5- to 11-year-old children. Studies by Dodge and colleagues (79) have found that the tendency for physically abused children to display aggressive regulatory strategies and conduct problems may be partially mediated by their unique ways of processing social and emotional cues in which they (a) are especially aware of hostile cues in the environment, (b) perceive peers' neutral actions as hostile, (c) access aggressive responses from memory, and (d) believe that aggressive strategies lead to positive outcomes.

Maltreated children have also been found to cope with distress by withdrawing from and avoiding peers during free play sessions. Given maltreated children's frequent use of avoidant and aggressive regulatory strategies, it is not surprising that they tend to experience depression and anxiety (81) and to be less popular and socially competent than their nonmaltreated peers (82) To summarize, maltreated children have been found to exhibit maladaptive regulatory strategies in which they verbally or physically vent their anger, in much the same ways as children with conduct problems. Unlike children with conduct problems, however, maltreated children also tend to rely upon avoidance and withdrawal strategies to cope\with distress.

p 182

Educational And Practical Implications

The development of flexible, adaptive ways of regulating emotion is essential to the emergence of children's emotional literacy and to their everyday adaptive functioning. Our review outlined three age-related trends in the development of children's regulation of emotion, each of which has practical implications for teachers, child psychologists, and other people working with children. As children develop, they rely more upon internal strategies that regulate the cognitive-experiential component of emotion. Children's ability to regulate emotion without the assistance of others and to implement situationally appropriate regulatory strategies also improves with age. This suggests that young children (i.e., 5 or 6 years old) who are having difficulty managing negative emotion may require considerable individualized attention and that they will respond most readily to behavioral tasks, such as games or other engaging activities.

Older children (i.e., 9 or 10 years old), on the other hand, are capable of coping with distress by thinking about other things and are often able to assess the needs of situations and apply appropriate regulatory strategies without requiring adult intervention.

There are times when being aware of sex differences in children's strategy use could help educators and practitioners direct children to use appropriate strategies. For example, the research we reviewed suggests that girls are more likely than boys to attempt to regulate emotion by thinking about their feelings and seeking out the support of others, while boys are more likely to use physical exercise. Children's ability to regulate emotion is probably influenced to some degree by their fund of emotional knowledge which implies that teaching children about how to recognize and label emotions in others could help them regulate adaptively.

The three age-related, developmental trends that we outlined are moderated by a number of interpersonal and individual factors. Research suggests that children's ability to regulate emotion is affected by their parents, who influence them indirectly by observational learning, directly by teaching and coaching, and by controlling children's exposure to different situations.

Teachers and other practitioners influence children in the same three ways. For instance, teachers, through their interactions with students, teachers, and administrators, model for children how to regulate emotion appropriately in the classroom. Teachers and practitioners also instruct children directly about how to manage distress, as Jennifer's teacher did when she encouraged her not to take to heart the bovs' insensitive remarks. In the process of designing and creating a comfortable learning environment, teachers also dictate the opportunities that children are afforded to learn about emotion regulation. The use of media (e.g., computers, television, books) affords children a range of opportunities for learning how to manage emotion. Children who are depressed, have conduct problems, or have been maltreated are likely to have more difficulty regulating emotion adaptively than other children.

p 183

Teachers and practitioners who are aware of these problems may be able to assist children in compensating for the deficits in emotion regulation that often accompany these problems.

GLOSSARY for Chapter 6

Emotion-Responses that guide the individual's behavior and serve as information that helps the individual achieve goals. Emotions are thought to have three components. The cognitive-experiential component comprises thoughts and awareness of emotional states (i.e., one's feelings). The behavioral-expressive component comprises such domains as speech, body movement, facial expression, posture, and gesture (i.e., the visible signs of emotion). The physiological-biochemical component comprises physical states, and is reflected in such measures as brain activitv, heart rate, skin response, and hormone levels. (Like the cognitive-experiential component, this dimension is generally not visible to others.)

Emotional Knowledge- A child's fund of information about emotion and emotional experience in the self and others that is used to tmderstand and interpret events in the environment.

Emotion Regulation - The process of initiating, altering, or maultaining responses within or between cognitive-experiential, behavioral-expressive and physiologica 1-biochemical components of emotion.

External Regulatory Strategy- A way of managing emotion that involves the individual altering his or her behavior or the environment.

Internal Regulatory Strategy- A way of managing emotion that involves the individual altering his or her inner experience (i.e., thoughts and subjective feelings).

For this chapter's reference list, click: Chapter 6 Reference List

Educator's Commentary (re: chapter 6)

Patrica Moore Harbour and Jill Stewart

p 193

It is disturbing that the development of emotion regulation does not currently have a definable place in the curriculum. It is most often incidental or sporadic, receiving sustained attention only during crisis situations.

The stressors in children's lives have increased dramatically in the past few years. Children are involved in serious situations with drugs, divorce, death, and physical and sexual abuse. They live with the stress of contemplating the likelihood of their own death. Juvenile suicide gang behavior, and violent behavior have become commonplace. They signal the need for a comprehensive and holistic teaching approach that encompasses the development and management of emotions. Strategies for developing appropriate responses to emotion regulation must be addressed now and at all levels of a child's development.

Current approaches to handling problem situations include dismissal from school, referral to counseling or therapy; medication, and/or parent-teacher conferences. Such external management strategies rarely do more than provide temporary solutions, since the source of the disturbance remains untapped. These measures can become more effective, however, if they are used in conjunction with teaching children to identify stressors, develop effective coping skills, and choose appropriate management strategies.

Research tells us that stressors are defined as controllable and uncontrollable and this delineation can provide a framework for effective strategies. We know with age, children■s use of internal and solitary strategies become more fine-tuned. In the classroom, we can turn this fine tuning, to advantage as a natural, integral part of the subject matter.


p 194

We know how to evaluate a student■s prior academic knowledge, but how do we evaluate student■s prior knowledge of a subject?

Often children internalize the wrong reason something happens to them. Educators can help by helping children ■understand their feelings and reactions.■

... many school systems are investing in support systems such as social workers who go into homes to work with the parents.

"Latchkey" times [ie time between when school is over and parents get home] -- important influences on the children- since kids have access to friends, older children in the neighborhood, the internet, etc. So schools are developing after school programs. [in the ■older days■ the kids met their mother when they got home.]

"Schools are also beginning to employ conflict resolution specialists..."

Emotion intelligence courses ■cannot be an add-on to the existing curriculum, for example, a time set aside once a week to discuss emotion regulation. Instead, teaches must incorporate opportunities for developing emotion regulation into the curriculum at every level and in every subject.■

"Frustration over an algebraic equation can be acknowledged and discussed..."

"Coaching and modeling are imperative. Teachers who are uncomfortable with ■touch-feely■ issues must be educated to realize that emotions are just as important as intelligence if one is to educate the whole child. "

p 195

"A curriculum that employs instructional strategies encompassing the needs of the whole child -- intellectual development and emotion regulation-- is the only one that will meet twenty-first century educational needs."

Chapter 7

Promoting Children's Social-Emotional Adjustment with Peers, by Steven Asher & Amanda Rose (U. Of Illinois)

Article discusses peer acceptance/rejection.

Rejected children have lower self-esteem, more social anxiety, and depression.

[Faust, Baum, Forehand (1985) An examination of the association between social relationships and depression in early adolescence. Journal of Applied Developmental Psychology, 6, pp, 291-297. Cole, Carpentieri (1990) Social status and comorbidity of child depression and conduct disorder. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 58, pp. 748-757. Kupersmidt, Patterson (1991) Child peer rejection, aggression, withdrawal, and perceived competence as predictors of self-reported behavior problems in preadolescence. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 19, pp. 427-449. Boivan, Poulin, Vitaro (1994) Depressed mood and peer rejection in childhood. Development and Psychopathology, 6, pp. 483-498. ]

P 210 Maintaining friendships over time predicts ■positive school adjustment.■ [Ladd, G.W. (1990) Having friends, keeping friends, making friends and being liked by peers in the classroom: Predictors of children■s early school adjustment? Child Development, 61, pp 1081-1100.]

p 211 Rejected children are more likely to drop out of school.

Asher, Parker (1989) The significance of peer relationship problems in childhood. In B. H. Schneider, G. Attili, J. Nadel and R. P. Weissberg (Eds.) Social Competence in Developmental Perspective (pp. 5-23). Amsterdam: Kluwer Academic Publishing

p 211 Rejected children are absent more often. (Since they don't have the legal option to drop out) [DeRosier, Kuperschmidt, Patterson (1994) Children■s academic and behavioral adjustment as a function of the chronicity and proximity of peer rejection. Child Development, 65, pp. 1799-1813.]

p 212 More withdrawn children are more likely to seek help than aggressive children. [Asher, Zelis et al (1991) Self-referral for peer relationship problems among aggressive and withdrawn low-accepted children. In J. Parkhurst & D. Rabiner (Chairs), The behavioral characteristics and the subjective experiences of aggressive and withdrawn/submissive rejected children. Symposium conducted at the meeting of the Society for Research in Child Development, Seattle.


Here are a few academic/scientific references to help you get started if you are doing research or writing university papers, dissertations, etc.

(Be sure you have also seen: list of Peter Salovey and John Mayer's work)

This list came from the Nancy Eisenberg et al article in Emotional Development..., Salovey/Slutyer (Eds.), pp. 153-155 (Reprinted with the Dr. Eisenberg's permission.)


Achenbach, T.M., & Edelbrock, C. (1983). Manual for the Child Behavior Checklist and the Revised Child Behavior Profile. Burlington, VT: Queen City Printers.

Altshuler, J.L., & Ruble, D. N. (1989). Developmental changes in children's awareness of strategies for coping with uncontrollable stress. Child Development, 60, 1337-1349.

Balswick, J., & Avertt, C. (1977). Differences in expressiveness: Gender, interpersonal orientation, and perceived parental expressiveness as contributing factors. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 39,121-127.

Bates, J.E., Bayles, K., Bennet, D. S., Ridge, B., & Brown, M. M. (1991). Origins of externalizing behavior problems at eight years of age. In D. J. Pepler & K.H. Rubin (Eds.), The development and treatment of childhood aggression. (pp.93-120). Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.

Batson, C. D. (1991). The Altruism Question: Toward a social-psychological answer. Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.

Block, I. H., & Block, J. (1980). The role of ego-control and ego-resiliency in the organization of behavior In W. A. Collins (Ed.), Development of cognition, affect, and social relations. The Minnesota symposia on child psychology (Vol.13, pp.39-101). Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.

Block, J. H., & Gjerde, P. F. (1986). Distinguishing between antisocial behavior and undercontrol. In D. Olweus, J. Block, & M. Radke-Yarrow (Eds.), Development of antisocial and prosocial behavior: Research, theories, and issues (pp.177-206). Orlando: Academic Press.

Block, J. H. & Gjerde, P. F. (1990). Depressive symptoms in late adolescence: A longitudinal perspective on personality antecedents. In J. Rolf, A. S. Masten, D. Cicchetti, K. H. Nuechterlein, & S. Weintraub (Eds.), Antecedents of adolescent depression (pp. 334-36O). New York: Cambridge University Press.

Block, J. H. & Gjerde, P. F. (1944). Personality antecedents of depressive tendencies in 18-year-olds: A prospective study. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 60, 726-738.

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Brody, L. R. (1985). Gender differences in emotional development: A review of theories and research. Journal of Personality, 53, 102-109.

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Buck, R. (1984). The Communication of Emotion. New York: Guilford.

Campbell, S. B. (1991). Longitudinal studies of active and aggressive preschoolers: Individual differences in early behavior and in outcome. In D. Cicchetti & S. L. Toth (Eds.), Internalizing and externalising expressions of dysfunction: Rochester symposium on developmental psychopathology (Vol.2). Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.

Campos, J. J., Campos, R. G., & Barrett, K. C. (1989). Emergent themes in the study of emotional development and emotion regulation. Developmental Psychology 25, 394-402.

Carey, T. C., Finch, A. J., & Carey, M. P. (1991). Relation between differential emotions and depression in emotionally disturbed children and adolescents. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 59, 594-597.

Carlo, G., Eisenberg, N., Troyer, D., Switzer G., & Speer A. L. (1991). The altruistic personality: In what contexts is it apparent? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 61, 450-458.

Casey, R. J., & Schlosser S. (1994). Emotional responses to peer praise in children with and without a diagnosed externalizing disorder. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 40, 60-81.

Caspi, A., Bem, D., & Elden G.G., Jr. (1989). Continuities and consequences of interactional styles across the life course. Journal of Personality, 57, 375-406.

Caspi, A., Henry, B., McGee, R. 0., Moffitt, T. E., & Silva, P. A. (1995). Temperamental origins of child and adolescent behavior problems: From age three to age fifteen. Child Development, 66, 55-58.

Caspi, A., Moffitt, T. E., Silva, P. A., Stouthamer-Loeber M., Krueger, R. F, & Schmutte, P. S. (1994). Are some people crime-prone? Replications of the personality-crime relationship across countries, genders, races, and methods. Criminology 32, 163-195.

Cassidy J., Parke, R. D., Butkovsky; L., & Braungart, J. M. (1992). Family-peer connections: The roles of emotional expressiveness within the family and children's understanding of emotion. Child Development, 63, 603-618.

Compas, B. E. (1987). Coping with stress during childhood and adolescence. Psychological Bulletin, 101, 393-403.

Compas, B. E., Banez, G. A., Malcarne, V, & Worsham, N. (1991). Perceived control and coping with stress: A developmental perspective. Journal of Social issues, 47, 23-34.

Davis, M. H. (1994). Empathy: A social psychological approach. Madison, WI: Brown & Benchmark.

Denham, S. A. (1989). Maternal affect and toddlers' social-emotional competence. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry, 59, 368-376.

Denham, S.A. (1993). Maternal emotional responsiveness and toddlers' social-emotional competence. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 34, 715-728.

Denham, S. A., & Grout, L. (1992). Mothers' emotional expressiveness and coping: Relations with preschoolers' social-emotional competence. Genetic, Social, and General Psychology Monographs, 118, 73- 101.

Denham, S. A., & Grout, L. (1993). Socialization of emotion: Pathway to preschoolers' emotional and social competence. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior, 17, 205-227.

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Dunn, J., & Brown, J. (1994). Affect expression in the family, children's under-standing of emotions, and their interactions with others. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 40, 120-1237.

Dunn, J., Bretherton, I., & Munn, P. (1987). Conversations about feeling states between mothers and their young children. Developmental Psychology, 23, 132-139.

Dunn, J., Brown, J., & Beardsall, L. (1991). Family talk about feeling states and children's later understanding of others' emotions. Developmental Psychology, 27, 448-455.

Dunn, J., Brown, J., Slomkowski, C., Telsa, C., & Youngblade, L. (1991). Young children's understanding of other people's feelings and beliefs: Individual differences and their antecedents. Child Development, 62, 1352-1366.

Eisenberg, N., & Fabes, R. A. (1990). Empathy: Conceptualization, assessment, and relation to prosocial behavior. Motivation and Emotion, 14, 131-149.

Eisenberg, N., & Fabes, R. A. (1992). Emotion, regulation, and the development of social competence. In M. S. Clark (Ed.), Review of personality and social psychology: Emotion and social behavior (Vol.14, pp. 119-150). Newbury Park, CA: Sage.

Eisenberg, N., & Fabes, R. A. (1994). Mothers' reactions to children's negative emotions: Relations to children's temperament and anger behavior. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 40, 138-156.

Eisenberg, N., & Fabes, R. A. (1995). The relation of young children's vicarious emotional responding to social competence, regulation, and emotionality. Cognition and Emotion, 9, 203-229.

Eisenberg, N., & Miller, P. (1987). The relation of empathy to prosocial and related behaviors. Psychological Bulletin, 101, 91-119.

Eisenberg, N., & Okun, M. A. (1996). The relations of dispositional regulation and emotionality to elders' empathy-related responding and affect while volunteering. Journal of Personality, 64, 157-183.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, R. A., Bernzweig, J., Karbon, M., Poulin, R., & Hanish, L. (1993). The relations of emotionality and regulation to preschoolers' social skills and sociometric status. Child Development, 64, 1418-1438.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, R. A., Carlo, G., & Karbon, M. (1992). Emotional responsivity to others: Behavioral correlates and socialization antecedents. In N. Eisenberg & R. A. Fabes (Eds.), New Directions in Child Development, 55, 57-73.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, R. A., Carlo, G., Troyer, D., Speer, A. L., Karbon, M., & Switzer, G. (1992). The relations of maternal practices and characteristics to children's vicarious emotional responsiveness. Child Development, 63, 583-602.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, R. A., Miller, P. A., Shell, C., Shea, R., May-Plumee, T (1990). Preschoolers' vicarious emotional responding and their situational and dispositional prosocial behavior. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 36, 507-529.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, N. A., Minore, D., Mathy, R., Hanish, L., & Brown, T. (1994). Children's enacted interpersonal strategies: Their relations to social behavior and negative emotionality. Merrill-Palnier Quarterly, 40, 212-232.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, N. A., Murphy, B., Karbon, M., Maszk, P., Smith, M., O' Boyle, C., & Suh, K. (1994). The relations of emotionality and regulation to dispositional and situational empathy-related responding. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 66, 776-797 .

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, N. A., Murphy, B., Karbon, M., Smith, M., & Maszk, P. (1996). The relations of children's dispositional empathy-related responding to their emotionality regulation, and social functioning. Developmental Psychology, 32, 195-209.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, N. A., Murphy, B., Maszk, P, Smith, M., & Karbon, M. (1995). The role of emotionality and regulation in children's social functioning: A longitudinal study. Child Development 66, 1360-1384.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, N. A., Nyman, M., Bernzweig, J., Pinuelas, A. (1994). The relations of emotionality and regulation to children's anger-related reactions. Child Development, 65, 109-128.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, N. A., Schaller, M., Carlo, G., & Miller, P. A. (1991). The relations of parental characteristics and practices to children's vicarious emotional responding. Child Development, 62, 1393-1408.

Eisenberg, N., Fabes, N. A., Schaller, M., Miller, P A., Carlo, G., Poulin, R., Shea, C., & Shell, R. (1991). Personality and socialization correlates of vicarious emotional responding. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 61, 459-471.

Fabes, R. A., Eisenberg, N., Karbon, M., Bernzweig, J.' Speer, A. L., & Carlo, G. (1994). Socialization of children's vicarious emotional responding and prosocial behavior: Relations with mothers' perceptions of children's emotional reactivity. Developmental Psychology, 30, 44-55.

Fabes, R. A., Eisenberg, N., & Miller, P. (1990). Maternal correlates of children's vicarious emotional responsiveness. Developmental Psychology, 26, 639-648.

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Reference List for Chapter 6

Here is a list of the references used by Eliot Brenner and Peter Salovey in their article "Emotion Regulation During Childhood: Developmental, Interpersonal and Individual Considerations."

(Be sure you have also seen: list of Peter Salovey and John Mayer's work)


Altshuler, J. L., & Ruble, D. N. (1989). Developmental changes in children's awareness of strategies for coping with uncontrollable stress. Child Development, 60, 1337-1349.

Altshuler, J. L., Genevro, J. L., Ruble, D. N., & Bornstein M. H. (1995). Children's knowledge and use of coping strategies during hospitalization for elective surgery. Journal of Applied Developmental Psychology, 16, 53-76.

Asarnow, J. R., Carlson, G. A., & Guthrie, D. (1987). Coping strategies, self-perceptions, hopelessness, and perceived family environments in depressed and suicidal children. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 55, 361-366.

Ballard, M. E., Cummings, E.M., & Larkin, K. (1993) Emotional and cardiovascular responses to adult's angry behavior and to challenging tasks in children of hypertensive and normotensive parents. Child Development, 64, 500-515.

Band, E. B., & Weisz, J. R. (1988). How to feel better when it feels bad: Children's perspectives on coping with everyday stress. Developmental Psychology, 24, 247-253.

Brenner, E. M., & Salovey, P. (1997). The influence of distraction, negative affectivity, and self-reported coping on children's regulation of happy and sad moods. Manuscript in preparation.

Bretherton, I., Fritz, J., Zahn-Waxler, C., & Ridgeway, D. (1986). Learning to talk about emotions: A functionalist perspective. Child Development, 57, 529-548.

Brown, K., Covell, K., & Abramovitch, R. (1991). Time course and control of emotion: Age differences in understanding and recognition. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 37, 273-287.

Buck, R. (1985). Prime theory: An integrated view of motivation and emotion. Psychological Review, 92, 389-413.

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Campos, J. J. Campos, R. G., & Barrett, K. C. (1989). Emergent themes in the study of emotional development and emotion regulation. Developmental Psychology, 23, 394-402.

Campos, J.J. Mumme, D. L., Kermoian, R., & Campus, R. G. (1994). A functionalist perspective on the nature of emotion. In N. Fox (Ed.), The Development of emotion regulation. Monographs of the Society for Research in Child Development (Vol. 59, pp. 284-303).

Carlo, G., Knight, G. P., Eisenberg, N., & Rotenberg, K. J. (1991). Cognitive processes and prosocial behaviors among children: The role of affective attributions and reconciliations. Developmental Psychology, 237, 456-461.

Casey, R. J., & Schlosser S. (1994). Emotional responses to peer praise in children with and without a diagnosed externalizing disorder. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 40, 60-81

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Emotion Work and Feeling Rules

The following is from a class handout. The only reference information I have is p50. Part Three, The Social Construction of Subjective Experience. In this book or chapter of a book there is an article by Arlie Russel Hochschild. The article is reprinted from, "Emotion Work, Feeling Rules, and Social Structure," in American Journal of Sociology 85, (1979) p 551-575.

Hochschild has more recently done work showing that trying to fake your emotions at work, or trying to force your employees to, is bad for business.

From the introduction to the article:

Many people believe that their "true" self speaks through their emotions--emotions that are immune to social influence. Yet many of these same people go to parties to feel good, enroll in anger- management classes, and seek therapy for phobias. [And take mood- altering drugs by the truckload!] They implicitly recognize that feelings are more pliable than they would like to admit. There may be something innate to human emotions, but they are far from fixed. Human emotions seem to vary as much as the languages that humans speak.

For many years, students of social life ignored emotions. That changed in the late 1970's. A number of sociologists began to study and write about the social shaping and consequences of human emotionality. Arlie Russel Hochschild was one of the first to explore the subject.

"Hochschild was admittedly not the first to recognize that emotions are subject to social regulation." [She credits Erving Goffman with this but says Goffman looked only at outward expressions of emotions.]

ARH says that "individuals not only attempt to express [what they think they should be expressing emotionally, but "also to feel what they think they should be feeling.

ARH calls this "emotion work" ie trying to make yourself feel something which others want or require you to feel. She says this "emotion work" is done on two levels.

1. Acting the part on the surface, while the underlying emotion remains the same. This she calls "surface acting."

2. Attempting to manipulate the underlying emotion, either through actually changing it through evoking a different emotion, or through suppressing it. This she calls "deep acting."

ARH says both kinds of acting are guided by "feeling rules." The introduction continues and says, "Although these rules are written nowhere and are seldom explicitly articulated, individuals subtly remind one another of them in a variety of ways. They inform one another of what they should, should not, and 'must' be feeling. Normal feelings are socially normative feelings, and individuals work on their emotions to feel normal."

Whoever wrote the introduction concludes it by saying, in effect, that it is not so much the voice of our true selves which speaks through our emotions, but the voice of the society we happen to have been born into. [That is a scary thought. Particularly scary since it is so true. The goal, then, is to turn down the volume of the social voice and turn up the volume of the inner voice. **]

Now the article contents:

She begins the article by talking about how there are conventional ways for expressing emotions, giving the example of behavior at parties, funerals, weddings.

She cites Erving Goffman's 1959 book, "The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life," and his article titled "Fun in Games" in the 1961 book "Encounters." (pp 18-84, Indianapolis, Bobbs-Merrill.)

Goffman says we hold back certain emotions which are not in conformity with what is expected in that social situation.

ARH says our emotion management indicates that are following some kind of rules which apparently "govern how people try or try not to feel in ways 'appropriate' to the situation. Such a notion suggests how profoundly the individual is 'social,' and 'socialized' to try to pay tribute to official definitions of situations, with no less than their feelings..."



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