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Ladder of Respect vs. Obedience

When a baby is born it feels no respect for its parents. On the scale of zero to ten, it sits at the bottom of the ladder at perfect zero. It has no concept of the meaning of respect. It simply needs its parents for its survival.

Over the next few years the parents have many opportunities to earn the respect of their children. The respect that they have earned can, of course, also be lost. In this way the parents move up and down the ladder of respect.

Respect is not something that just comes naturally in a parent-child relationship.

A parent can gain the obedience of most children through a system of rewards and punishments, but this is very different than earning true respect.

There are also some children and teenagers who can not be controlled by the same system of rewards and punishments which works on the majority of people, as well as on most animals. These children may grow up to be leaders, visionaries, rebels, revolutionaries, criminals or permanent residents in a mental institution.

Or, for some, they may never grow up. They may instead find that society's attempt to change them rather than nurture and develop their individuality becomes so painful that they take their own life to end the pain.

Core Topics

Respect | Empathy
Caring | Listening

Other EQI.org Topics:

Emotional Literacy
Invalidation | Hugs
Emotional Abuse |
Feeling Words
Depression |Education
Emotional Intelligence
Parenting | Personal Growth

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