*under construction

Imperatives

I am not an expert in grammar but I know what the "imperative" form a verb is. It is what you use when you want to tell someone what to do. It is also called the "command" form of the verb.

Gramatically, in English, the ending of the verb in the imperative form is usually about the same as the verb itself. So if the verb is "bring", the imperative form is "Bring.," like in "Bring me a chair."

Here are examples of using the imperative or command form of verbs.

Wait.

Stop.

Listen.

Sit down.

Come here.

Talk to me.

Look at me when I'm talking to you.

Wake up.

Eat your beans.

Wash your hands.

Go to your room.

Stop reading that crap on the EQI.org website.

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Here is a true story from my first book. I observed this several years before I ever started to talking to teens who cut.

One day I heard a mother hurling imperatives at the family dog. "Get back here! Get over here! Get inside the house!" A few moments later her teenage daughter came outside and the mother began ordering her around in exactly the same tone of voice she had just used on the dog.

EQ for Everybody, S. Hein, p 125

2014- I have decided to put the first name in of the teen who was being treated like the dog. Her name is Zoey. She lived in Fort Wayne, Indiana.

[steve] oh, btw, do u know what the imperative form of a verb means?
[mia ] i dont think i do sorry
[steve] ok
[steve] its like the command form
[steve] like when u talk to a dog
[steve] and say sit
[steve] fetch
[steve] roll over
[steve] it means u must do it
[steve] its imperative that you do it

After I had explained this, later in the chat she said "Talk to her."

So I asked, "Is that an imperative?"

She replied, "No, it's a suggestion."

-

Obviously, Mia felt defensive when I asked if it was an imperative, so she denied that it was. She could have laughed or said "oops" or many other things. These little responses tell us a lot about what kind of environment a person has been raised in. From this and many other things I know about Mia, she has been struggling to survive in an emotionally hostile environment where it is common to verbally attack one another. So it is natural she has learned to be defensive.

Compare Mia's reply with Nelia's below for example.

(Nelia is a teenager from Indonesia)

Steve: just a sec

Nelia: take your time

Steve: is than an order? ha ha

Steve: Here is more reading for you... to help with your English... ha ha

Then she read this page...

Nelia: "I guess it is an order. ha ha"