(parents say...) just takes too much time to communicate in a way that connects us with children. I've personally seen this land mine of an idea explode all over my own

How many times I have heard, Why isn't NVC taught to children?

I found it very touching. The need for undersanding? and compassion so often goes unmet.

There was something wrong with her mentally or she had a horrible childhood caused likely by her parents. People aren't? born bad, original sin is bullshit.

I am not saying you should not strive for improvement. I just think you concept of improvement is too idealistic. I think your idea that no child is bad is fallacious and I would dare you to support that with statistics. I will disprove it with one incident.? In my hometown (2300 people) a girl of the age of 12, had a boyfriend who was 21 and she convinced her boyfriend to help her kill her parents and her little brother. Isn't she just a innocent angel.

the point is about our size and how children might feel intimidated by us especially if we think it is okay to hit them in response to their supposed bad behavior. no child is bad just misunderstood...most of us do not take the time to? hear them, instead we label them as bad or whatever. I know I miss the mark ALOT & it is my continued desire to be more than what the adults in my childhood were to me. it is as if people grow up and forget what it was like to be a little person with no rights.

how would you like it if a giant came up to you & told you everything you are doing is wrong & when you do not do it his way he harshly punished you & hit you? we are like giants to these children considering our size. they love &? adore us & we must meet them in a loving way. how much better would this life be if everyone treated one another with loving kindness? mistakes I have made with my own children & humans in general. thankfully there is grace & forgiveness heals. blessings~

that's the idea.? it is called communication, teaching the child to communicate his or her feelings allows many wonderful possibilities in the child's life. do you remember what it was like to be a child and no one cared about your hurtful heart? thank goodness adults are realizing the importance of respecting these precious creatures. children deserve to be respected, how else can they learn what respect is. blessings to you~

who's in charge here? did the kid ever pick up? his clothes?

We use these definitions as a way of working with needs and strategies and to help? us navigate our way down to the deeper needs that often motivate us.

Can somebody explain why Ms. Kashtan denies that "negative attention" is a human need? It seems that attention is certainly a human need, and that negative attention fulfills that need in some way. It may not be as rewarding over the long term, but that seems like saying people don't aren't fulfilling a need by eating junk food simply because it is unhealthy, when in reality it does fulfill the larger need for food in general.

We're defining needs as a universal quality that all people possess. We define a strategy as the way we get the need met. So, as you pointed out, using negative attention fulfills the need for attention in some way, it makes negative attention a strategy to meet the need for attention. Even if attention is a need, it is also a strategy to get other, often deeper needs met like acknowledgment, love and belonging.

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Children act up for many reasons. To describe all these reasons as a need is to mute the meaning of the word need. I would say they act up (I certainly? did) from greed.


Greed can be translated to a need...

Using a perverse and meaningless translation dictionary..... then sure.

But I like your way of thinking,? we can now all appreciate with wall street millionaires lobby the government to use force to steal our money for bailouts. After all, Greed = Need lol.
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Ok, she has some great? info in here. But the puppets are just too much. :)