Jen10

may 7 from ocean

Laura is afraid she might "do something"... like harm herself. I'm kinda worried, she sounded suicidal... she said she was thinking about her granny that died and other people that died, and animals that died, and looking at pictures of herself where she looked happy, and that made her start crying... Ylthaed says: *hug* that would make someone cry to think about it... ...it's so much easier to run, than face all this pain here all alone.. says: ..........yer..........i think it's prob just set it off tho...just triggered it..........i haven't cried in at least a month.........so im cryin bad.......im hopin i don't do n e fin 2nite............ ...it's so much easier to run, than face all this pain here all alone.. says: ..........im worried...but wateva i do, i do i spose..... ...it's so much easier to run, than face all this pain here all alone.. says: ..............thanx for like bein here wen u cud like.... Ylthaed says: like... do what kind of thing ...it's so much easier to run, than face all this pain here all alone.. says: like......harm, drink......etc...... Ylthaed says: i think ur depression is what is telling u thats somethings wrong... maybe ...it's so much easier to run, than face all this pain here all alone.. says: mayb...............wish i knew wat...........id kill myself just to know.........

from her spaces may 8

it happened agen.....

it happened agen......

....i do help them.....i am ment to b here for them to get angry at........both of them angry, both needed me.....i was there for both. They'r a lot less angry now...now that i was there for them to get there anger out............i feel terrible now...i wanna cry agen...or tlk to sum1......well harm and tlk to sum1.....but i can't............ppl hav there own lives laura, u gotta get that into ur head........no one wants to hear bout ur life...no one cares....plz get it into ur thick head.......

plz......i don't wanna feel like this n e mor........im gonna giv up soon...so soon......im puttin pressure on ppl oo much...relyin on tlkin to them............it's bad laura...uve gotta stop....u hav to.......one way or another ur gonna suffer for wat u r doin.......one way or anova ur gonna suffer for bein here and livin.......and one way or anova ur death is cumin soon.......u can feel it laura can't u........i think dats y uve been so depressed..........u know wen animals can sense wen they'r gonna die and their times up....well i think ur doin dat now......

well...enuf .....this is the end of the road........th tlkin stops....the preteding begins.........im doin this for ur own good, and well more other ppls good too.......it's for the best laura, u'll thank me sumday.....wen ur dead...........

ok......i hate doin this.....i hate thinkin.....ive gotta try to ignore all these feelins and get on wiv sum work...... OK...PULL URSELF TOGETHER GIRL, NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR UR SAD SOB STORY...........

u'l laugh if u read this agen.....but it was ur feelins.....it was u....ur life was and is a joke....