Recovering Teen says:

  • i actually used to ask everyone i could
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i'd make up these situations
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • "hypothetical"
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • about a friend or w/e... and i'd put the stuff my mom did into the story
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • and i'd ask what they thought
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • and a lot of them just said it was normal parenting and that the my "friend" was just being whiney
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • thats when i was the most afraid, actually
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i used to be afraid i was insane

    •  

    Recovering Teen says:

  • does that make sense?
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i dont know
    •

     

    Steve says:

  • yeah
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • thats when i got the most hurt and the most sad
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    Steve says:

  • hug
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • and i'd trust their opinions so much
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • hm...
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i just dug this huge pit for myself to hide in, you know?
    •

     

    Steve says:

  • yeah
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • every time i asked and got an answer that said they were just being parents
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • that'd be another shovel of dirt out from under me
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i got obsessed, sort of, with digging myself into the ground
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • it felt safe there
    •

     

    Steve says:

  • hug
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i got really deep, you know
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • thats when i tried to completely disapear
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • suicide and whatnot
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • i didnt want anyone to find me or to connect w/ me
    •

     

    Steve says:

  • *smile ....is glad ur talking
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • same
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • anyway
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • after i hurt myself so much i just sort of woke up one day
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • noticed i was 6 feet under and barely hanging on and for the first time realized i didnt deserve it
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • but i was too far down and i couldn't get out of my stupid hole
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    Steve says:

  • hug
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i had dug it the whole time w/out a ladder, you know?
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i didn't leave any way out for myself
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    Steve says:

  • hug
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i think thats when i found your eqi.org
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • that became my ladder
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    Steve says:

  • hug
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • when i was afraid of everyone else, you threw a rope in after me before you even actually knew me
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • thats what got me to the surface again
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • i wasn't as confused after that
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • i still get confused sometimes
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • but at least i have a way out now
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • i have people i know care about me
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    Recovering Teen says:

  • people who trust me
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    Steve says:

  • hug
    •

     

    Recovering Teen says:

  • does any of this make sense?
    •

     

    Steve says:

  • yep
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    Steve says:

     

    perfect sense