Milli page 1

Milli is Darren's ex-friend. She has also tried to kill herself. (See related article about the myth that teen depression is a "disease") In our first chat she thanked me for replying to her email, then she kept thanking me lots more times during the convo. At one point I started getting emotional and almost cried. At the end of the convo she remembered this, as you can see:

thank you for talking and everything and sorry for making you almost cry

In our convos Milli has also told me that she feels responsible for Darren trying to kill himself. And she told me her parents hit her when she was younger. And she has some memory of being sexually abused by a boy who was 4 years older when she was around 7

Milli is also one of the most emotionally supportive people I've ever met. Here is one little example:

i love our chats as well. they mean a lot to me, and i can always just be myself whenver i talk to you. its amazing. i will support you all of the way, to know that this helps people, who might not get a chance to be care about by someone, you are an amazing person.

thank you for being there for me, and everyone who needs you. you are a star.

Here is another

good night steve! i will be thinking of you! cuz ur so cool!!! and coolcool.

On Learning to Shoot a Gun in School

Bits of May 13, 2005 chat

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Bits of May 13, 2005 chat

steve says:
have u ever tried to kill urself, or thought about it
milli says:
yes
steve says:
how come
milli says:
im not sure, i was self harming for over 3 yrs, and i overdosed...but i dont anymore as i promised my boyfriend i wouldnt

milli says:
yeh, and people up front talking to makes me feel rele uncomfortable
steve says:
is it easier to talk online?
milli says:
yes, way easeir.
steve says:
yeah
steve says:
it makes sense
steve says:
its easier for me too actually
steve says:
but sometimes id rather be with a real person
milli says:
hm, well, i just dont like the whole eye contact thing
milli says:
yeh
steve says:
what about when ur crying... do u like to be hugged
milli says:
but not by my parents

milli says:
well, when they did find out they didnt ask why they just sent me to a counciler
steve says:
find out what .... that ud tried to kill urself
milli says:
yeh, and i self harmed

steve says:
hey have u learned to shoot a gun
milli says:
i was going to
milli says:
i didnt like it tho
milli says:
it made me feel bad
milli says:
i dont like guns
steve says:
me either
steve says:
i cant believe they make pple do that in england
milli says:
they do
steve says:
how come u didnt have to
milli says:
cuz i was unsafe..
-

you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
going to skool i feel so like unfree, its like breathing the same air over again
steve says:
yeah
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
we spend so much of our fucking time at skool and doing homework
steve says:
yep
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
its actually stupid
steve says:
and what have u learned about ur emotions and love and relationships and the things that really matter?
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
JACK SHIT
steve says:
have u ever heard of invalidation before u read my site
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
no
steve says:
lol
steve says:
did u ever see that joke about the shit family tree
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
nope
steve says:
there is a whole weppage on it
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
lol
steve says:
its hilarious

you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
lol!!!!!!!
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
thats so cooool!
steve says:
yeah its good eh
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
it is, its very good
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
i laughed!

you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
just to let you know prefects do have the authority to do that..
steve says:
i thought so
steve says:
what else do they do
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
they um, basically do the teachers dirty work i guess
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
in our skool they n e way
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
and they have to pay for their badge they get
you want it, you got it, you feel it, gun in hand says:
basically they do the lunch duties and stuff that the teachers normally have to do,so they miss out on their free lunch times within skool hours