Why I would kill myself  
I would prefer to give a young person my money than spend it on medicine, exams, hospital visits etc.

I don't have any health insurance so I will be paying for all the medical stuff myself. Today I was told an MRI scan would cost about 1,000 dollars.

I was also told if I admit myself into the hospital I would need a doctor's permission to leave.

I don't want to end up in a situation where I am not in control of my own life.

I don't want to have to ask permission to kill myself, for example if I wanted euthanasia. As I understand it the doctors still need to get permission even in the countries where it is legal. In other words, someone else is still in control of whether you can stop your own pain.